Denial, Fear or Hopelessness?

For the past week on the malnutrition ward, a medical team of 5 and I have been trying to convince Grandma YC that her one-year old granddaughter is HIV infected, and needs treatment. 

Every morning during rounds, we sit with Grandma at the child’s bedside to explain (in Swahili) that the HIV test came back positive. And each day, Grandma YC says nothing, refuses to respond to questions and makes no eye contact. Though we’ve advised her repeatedly to, she simply will not enroll her granddaughter into HIV care. We’re not sure if it’s denial or fear, or a sense of hopelessness, but it’s maddening for us to watch this child go unattended in any case. 

The mother of the one-year old girl has run away to Kenya. We suspect that she has gone for HIIV treatment in a place where she can remain anonymous, and so that the people in her village will not discover her status. The father of the child died about a year ago. We can’t say for sure, but it’s very possible that AIDS was the cause.

We hope that in time, with our daily visits to the bedside, Grandma YC will come around.  We can only guess how Grandma is feeling, how difficult it must be knowing that her son-in-law died, most likely from AIDS, and now having her daughter run away because of HIV stigma. And while her seemingly cold responses to our advice is frustrating, it is Grandma YC after all, who has to swallow this bitter experience with HIV, not me. 

We pray that she will come to understand that HIV need not be a death sentence for her grand-daughter, if we are able to begin treatment soon.